poems of a 15-yr-old attention-seeker

I was 15 years old when i wrote these angsty poems inspired by a broken heart and way too much alone time in my room with nothing to distract me. I have TONS more, but these are the ones that bring up explicit feelings and memories of when I was writing them. At the time, my recent ex-boyfriend told me I was an attention-seeker because I posted my ~poetry~ on my Myspace... I guess I did want validation but I'm glad I posted them because I like rereading them every so often. Anyway here are a few...

i could steal your smile with a mix of tongue and teeth
simple words breaking simple hearts
is it enough to say i do not love you?
let the morning snow cover up our history like it covers up our footprints
and please let me walk away, let me shut the door behind me
you'll miss me in the morning, but you'll have forgotten me by lunch.

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risking your king for a pawn
and your queen's heart is bitter
i know you didn't want this
and you're sorry that i left
but you'll go on pretending
you've got nothing to regret
you'll find no comfort here
you'll find nothing at all
_________________________________________

my chest could concave and leave you abrupt
take a piece of my confidence, leave me in a rut
I could kill a part of myself, and I would always silently blame you
hear a million sad songs and know that they all somehow ring true
I'm writing in my room, I'm riding in my car
you insist that you're fine, and I really think you are

__________________________________________

I walk until my feet bleed and my ankles feel like rocks
My path will be washed away by morning
Please God, don't let it rain.
Please God, heal me and send me on my way.
My tears come in floods and extinguish the sun
Leave me in this darkness and wait for my cheeks to dry
Leave me in this silence and let me hear myself blink
Please God, I need you to save me from drowning
Please God, I can't even feel myself sink
__________________________________________

a fix to a fix to a fix to a problem i can't remember
your touch was meant to heal my pain, but i couldn't even feel you
then i kissed you to forget his lips, but it only made me miss them
sometimes in my sleep ill hold my pillow close and tell myself you're here
and that you never left, you never will, and i cover it in tears.
i know it'll fade, i know i'll be fine, i've heard it all before
but when you have been forgotten first, you start to forget how.

1 comment:

  1. I actually like these poems. They are alot more coherent than anything I wrote at 15...

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