anxiety

anxiety is a cold blanket that covers me at night; i'm not allowed to sleep, i'm not allowed to stop thinking. 

i'm only allowed to dwell, to lie with eyes open

to watch the clouds move and wonder why time always feels so heavy 

anxiety is also heat; it's sweat dripping down the length of my back mid-sentence

it's a hot crowded dirty room i can't leave

so i spend the whole night in the corner, or 

i never leave my bed

the feeling that you're being watched or worse

that no one can see you